The Onion spotlights key features of new Apple Net radio service

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Issue Date: 
Jun 10 2013 - 12:15pm

From Issue:

Online satire newspaper has a very funny and characteristically clever list of "top features" of the new Apple Internet radio service today.

They are:

  • Each song preceded by 45-minute Tim Cook presentation
  • Option to play a different song in each earbud
  • Tons of Floyd
  • A daily morning zoo show with Siri and her rowdy friends
  • Ability to lower volume is disabled whenever a really good song is playing
  • Is eager to please
  • Audiobook chapters from Steve Jobs’ biography constantly sprinkled in throughout users’ listening sessions
  • Access to millions of songs readily available on Pandora, Spotify, and Google Play

See it at The Onion here.


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The development of Internet

The development of Internet radio monetization was a key focus among industry executives speaking at the New Music Seminar in New York.

That recommendation engine

That recommendation engine feature is particularly interesting.

If you are going to group

If you are going to group Spotify and Rhapsody into the "music you own" category, you may wish to point out that the subscriber never actually owns any of that calculator with taxes and insurance

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